Have you ever wondered why the youth of today were all born with keyboards in their hands? Or how they ended up with a repository of geek data before birth?

I still haven't figured it out.

But I've been embarrassed enough and frustrated enough – OK, I cried enough – due to my computer illiteracy that I refused to give up without learning how to operate my computer.

When I first started working with computers, I was pitiful. At that time, most employers still hadn't caught on to the need for a separate department to help staff with their computer related duties.

I survived by seeking out the co-worker who was most skilled with computers and programs. Whenever I had a question or needed to be shown how to do something, I would go to him. Pretty soon, he would see me coming and hold his fingers up like a cross to ward off evil. I kept coming anyway.

My first step was to try cajoling him. If that didn't work, I'd go on to the next step. I would sigh and tell my co-worker how I tried to use the “help” function on the computer but it had terms that were never defined. His eyes would become wide as he remembered his own troubles with the help feature and he would quickly tell me to never, ever use “help” because it's impossible to figure out what it is talking about. Evidently, if I was willing to go that far, I was deemed worthy of some assistance.

Now, this is where the really important stuff comes in. I promised that if he would help me, I would actually learn how to do what he was going to show me. This requires building trust. This means that you actually have to learn it. However, the payoff for keeping your word is 1) that you will be able to do it, and 2) when you have to ask for help again, you can point out that you aren't just another clueless computer illiterate who is wasting his time. You actually do learn.

To be successful, you have to break your helper's normal way of “showing” how to do whatever it was you asked. You know what I mean. The two second blur of fingers where he “demonstrates” something that takes 25 or 50 or 100 steps. You can't even see what he did, much less remember it.

At this point, you have to whip out paper and pencil and make him go slow enough so you can write down every single thing he does, every icon hit, every return entered, everything. Now, this is not one of your helper's native abilities. So you have to really exert some control to get everything written down. If he says something you don't understand, get him to tell you what it means in simple, non-computer language.

If you don't do this, you will return to your desk and stare blankly at your computer only to realize that you don't remember anything.

Once you have your written step-by-step set of instructions, do it over and over and over. You will only get it by practicing it. But eventually the payoff is really cool, even better than being able to understand the how-to computer books written for dummies.

The payoff for me came when I happened to notice how my helper was performing some function in his spreadsheet. I leaned over, told him that there was a much simpler way, and did it for him. The look on his face was worth enduring all those times I saw him trying to hide from me!

The only downside is that I sometimes feel a little hunted because of the number of people lining up to ask me for help!